I am not Earl, and I am not from Brooklyn, and the closest I have been to Brooklyn is jamming out to the Beastie Boys as a younger man. But fear not, I have been called to pitch hit for the Earl of Brooklyn, who should be back next week to close out the year.
Anyone still reading? Didn’t think so, well, for the eight percent still with me, let continue, and I promise, Earl will be back.
Its kind of amazing, in an environment where the season has been promoted as an era of good feelings and well wishing, has turned into a dirty commercial grab and angry people. Its a amazing to work with the unwashed masses, who wait until Christmas eve to call and complain about a service, yet don’t understand why we cannot have a technician out there on Christmas day. Sad to say that we cannot explain to them that only us peons have to work on the holidays, the higher paid techs and managers are off, or only are coming in to handle major issues and businesses and honey, your eBay beanie Baby store doesn’t count.
But then again, they are firing me anyway, maybe I will bust that out. .
But lets get back to Christmas, shall we?
For all you non-Christian people out there, yes, its common Knowledge that Jesus (the Religious Icon, not the guy that Trump is always talking about that does his lawn) wasn’t born on December, 25, Wasn’t born in December at all, and most likely wasn’t even born in the winter at all, but the summer. December 25th was the pagan festival Saturnalia, and the biggest feast of the year, so the Christian Church swiped it for the biggest Christian celebration, after Easter. Heck if the Pagans are gonna party and get a three day weekend, so are we, and we are gonna do it for the right reasons, right? Especially since on Easter we have to give up stuff, but a Birthday Party? Let is all hang out!
So why was Saturnalia so important?
Imagine if you will a time before Q Wal-Mart, even before Woolworth and Sears, even before Amazon.com (If you are looking for late gifts- use our link on the side!) when most people were farmers. The Winter sucked. It was cold, the ground was cold, you had to eat leftovers and Big Bang Theory was in re-runs for 4 months. What was in the middle? The end of December. So lets toast the halfway point with a party- a big ol feast. Thats why Saturnaila was so big, its like pulling over to a Wendy’s halfway to Grandma’s. You just have to make it to Wendy’s you get to stop, eat , take a break, then get on the road. By the time you are almost brain-dead from the sixth time hearing Menudo’s Silent Night, you are almost there.
So today, thank whomever you want, be it God, Allah, Your Parents, or a random meeting of two Atoms that you are far better off than a huge number of people on this planet. If you can go to the faucet and get Drinkable Water, you are far ahead of millions of people, if you can open a fridge and get something to eat, you are well ahead of even more. If you sleep in a warm bed, you are even better off. Enjoy what gifts you have, and be mindful of those who don’t have as much as you do. Be mindful of those in pain. Be mindful of people that are just holding on to what they have. Merry Christmas everyone, and thank you for reading.
1) Dina Lohan, Lindsay’s mother, 51-year-old was charged with drunk driving after being pulled over for allegedly going 77 mph in a 55 mph zone on the Northern State Parkway (Long Island, NY) on September […]