Movie Review: Crazy Eights
The Premise is fairly sound, lets get a few people you kinda know, throw them in a psycho thriller, spend what little money you have on those names and some really good set design, and go for . . well, lets be honest, its IT without Tim Curry, Steven King or a coherent plot.
6 people come together at the funeral for number 7, and since this is called the Crazy Eights- guess who the creepy chick/killer is. Yeah. I’m skipping to the spoilers. What? You want me to break down the characters? There aren’t any. All 6 are pretty much what you see is what you get and might as well be wearing name tags with their motivations on it. They find a box with a body in it. Yup, there is number 8. They wind up in a “research facility” where all 8 were experimented on- that they all repressed for decades, but considering how wooden they are, its not surprising. The 6 just forget about trying to escape, or even use their cell phones after a time. The Kills come fairly quick right after you stop caring completely and start looking at your watch, 2 are good, the rest- uh, not so much. The logic gaps are big enough to fit the State of Maine in, and some of the script is downright shit.
I hope the set designer got paid, since that person is the only one that did his or her job. Straight ZERO people.
There is no bonus features on this disk, other than subtitles and the Miss Horrorfest WebContest, something that seems like a homeless-man’s version of Scream Queens, only with more skin and less talent.
I did get another movie from the 8 Films to Die for series- Borderland. Lets see if this After Dark HorrorFest series can do SOMETHING right.
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