In 1995 my kids, teenagers really, discovered WAAF 107.3FM radio. The station played a combination of modern rock, classic rock and heavy metal. The type of music just about all of us enjoyed. Whenever we were in the car, no matter where we were going, the radio was always on and it was always set to WAAF. Then one day we were introduced to the new afternoon drive show hosts, Opie and Anthony.
Opie and Anthony (or Opium and Anal Drip as they were called amongst my kids and their friends, don’t ask, I never did) started out small, just getting their footing on how their sense of humor would play out in Boston and areas further West in Massachusetts. It wasn’t long before they were pushing the envelope. They were responsible for “Whip ‘Em Out Wednesday” where females traveling down the turnpike and freeways were encouraged to flash their boobs at passing motorists. This turned out to be an extremely popular escapade. There are no statistics on the number of accidents caused by this behavior, but I’d imagine there were some, especially by the “older” driver whose eyes grew wider as the jaw dropped. Then came the less successful “Testicle Tuesday” where men were encouraged to drop their drawers and let ‘it all hang out’. The fact that so many people participated in these stunts left me wondering what it was about these two that had people falling over themselves to do what they wanted.
But not all of Opie and Anthony’s escapades/challenges had anything to do with the public. One day they invited a lab tech from one of the hospitals in the Boston area to decide which one of them had the higher sperm count. They each took turns filling a specimen cup (they even had a bet going as to which one could fill it the fastest) and then waited for the results of the ‘count-up’. When all was said and done, Anthony won the contest crediting his ‘swarthy’ ancestry. It’s only now that I question if they really pulled this off or if it was a hoax. But the day came when the duo pushed the envelope too far for the people of Boston and the station found itself in the middle of a poop zone.
16 years ago Opie and Anthony made the announcement that Boston’s much beloved Mayor Menino had died in a car accident in Florida. The fact that this happened on April Fool’s Day had no impact on the listening public. According to the Boston Globe “friends began showing up at the home of Menino’s sister-in-law to offer condolences”. At the time of this April Fool’s Day prank, Mayor Menino was on a plane coming back from Florida and was told by his driver upon landing that “he was dead.” Well, this didn’t sit well with Menino so he sent off a letter to the FCC asking them to fine WAAF. In lieu of being fined the station offered to raise money for His Honor’s favorite charity but the Mayor said “no, it’s not about money, it’s about professional ethics.” A few days later the station’s general manager and program manager were both suspended and Opie and Anthony were fired.
Just a few months later the duo started working at WNEW, a radio station in New York. A 1998 article in the NYT reported that their contract did not contain a no pranks clause so I’m not sure if they were fired from that position for their 2003 “Sex for Sam” stunt that had people competing for prizes by having sex in public places. I believe the winner was the couple that had sex on the steps of St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York City. Anyway, fired or just canceled, they lost their jobs only to be hired by SiriusXM Satellite Radio. Sounds more like a reward to me, just sayin’. That leads us to what recently happened in Times Square and the firing of one half of the Opie and Anthony Radio Show.
It seems Anthony “was in Times Square taking some pictures when an African-American woman objected to being photographed.” This is when he claims he was assaulted by the woman. He didn’t report the assault to the police saying, “Because I can take some punches without wasting the cops’ time.” Instead he decided to go to his Twitter account and let loose a barrage of insults laced with profanity and inflammatory language.(Name calling with a racist bent)
Now I have to wonder how this man could have absolutely no knowledge of what a hot button issue this is in America right now. Has he learned nothing from the Donald Sterling scandal at all? And he’s actually flabbergasted that SiriusXM had the audacity to fire him over this. He states, “Sirius decided to cave and fire me. Welcome to bizarro world. Fired for s&^% that wasn’t even on the air and wasn’t illegal. So, who’s next.?” That’s a good question. The proverbial ball is now in Opie’s court. These two have been together since 1995 (or even earlier), that’s longer than some marriages. Will Opie quit in solidarity? Will he tell Anthony, ‘hey, man, you’re on your own with this one’? I don’t know but it’s gonna be interesting. Like Ron White said, “You can’t fix stupid.” I’m just not sure who the stupid ones are anymore.
Massachusetts is 1 of 4 states where private citizen ownership of fireworks is illegal. Delaware, New York and New Jersey are the other three. But that doesn’t stop people in Massachusetts from going to New Hampshire to purchase them and bring them back home. You can usually start hearing the loud bang of a firecracker (salutes, cherry bombs) around the last day of June, first day of July with the larger ordinance showing up at family BBQs on the 4th.
Now I’m not talking about people shooting off rockets with a red glare or any bombs bursting in air, those are reserved for community-sponsored firework displays done by professionals like the Grucci Brothers. No, the ones I’m talking about are the big ones you hold with the fingers of one hand while you light the fuse with a match or a lighter in the other hand. Hold that lit firecracker for too long and BANG you’re next stop is the emergency ward of your local hospital. Well, the 4th of July in my area was a total washout what with all the rain from Hurricane Arthur and most communities postponed their celebration until the 5th. That included the backyard BBQ firecracker master.
The only firecrackers legal in Massachusetts
I once asked my father why Massachusetts banned people from owning fireworks and he told me that some time before World War II when people had access to whatever type of firework they wanted the fuses were deceptively short and the firework would explode before people had a chance to throw it, and their finger or thumb would land at their feet. Then he would point to my Uncle Frank who was missing a finger as proof of what he said. Now my Uncle Frank served with the Army during WWII fighting in the European theater while my Dad was a Marine fighting in the Pacific. I had always thought Uncle Frank’s injury came as a result of his service. Could be my father was just telling me a cautionary tale to keep me from ever thinking about lighting a firecracker. Either way, it worked.
Too bad all those folks at all those 4th of July BBQs didn’t hear it. After the noise of the backyard firecrackers ended, the sounds of ambulance sirens began. One hand surgeon said his two busiest times of the year are winter and summer. In winter people stick their hand in the snow blower chute assembly to unclog their snow blower before turning it off, and in the summer when people play with firecrackers.
Like Ron White said, “You can’t fix stupid.”
Since the announcement of the decision of SCOTUS in favor of the Hobby Lobby we-won’t-provide-birth-control-to-our-female-employees-because-it’s-against-our-religious-beliefs, comments are showing up everywhere that if a woman wants birth control pills she can still get them, just pay the out-of-pocket costs.
Now, it’s been a long time since I needed birth control pills what with being on the other side of menopause, so I looked up on Google just how much birth control pills would set you back each month and found that it depended on what brand/type of birth control pills you took. They average anywhere from $20 to $50. That’s a lot of money if you ask me, but it’s still cheaper than having a child even if the father pitches in monetarily once the results of the DNA test comes back. So as it stands now, if you still want to have sex but not get pregnant you have to take that bull by the horns and sacrifice whatever you’re spending $20 to $50 a month on and buy your own birth control pills or stop having unprotected sex because your boyfriend/husband doesn’t want to wear a condom. Once again, the responsibility is all yours….5 strange men wearing black robes saw to that.
I saw a few reports on some “news” magazine shows about Cameron Diaz saying she doesn’t want any children, she doesn’t want to be a mother. The same goes for Chelsea Handler, Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi. People gasped. People asked out loud what kind of women are these, after all isn’t that the reason women were created?
Well, I for one applaud them. Not every woman on this planet is cut out to be a mother. In fact, an estimated 200 mothers kill their children every year in this country. I’m not talking about abortion here….these kids were born, brought home, and cared for right up until their mothers ended their lives.
As far as I know there isn’t anyone telling women that when they grow up and get a dog or a cat that they will have fulfilled their destiny……no, no one has ever said that. Nor has anyone ever said “Oh, if you don’t get a dog or a cat before you’re too old to get one, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”
I would like to suggest to women who know in their heart of hearts that they don’t want children to have their fallopian tubes cut and tied while they still have that option. You never know when those men in black robes will strike again.
Thanks for reading. Until next time.
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