ESPY Predictions Part 2

Welcome to part 2 of the ESPY Preview!espy2

Click here for Part 1


Best NFL Player


  • Calvin Johnson – Detroit Lions, Peyton Manning – Denver Broncos, Adrian Peterson – Minnesota Vikings, Aaron Rodgers – Green Bay Packers, JJ Watt – Houston Texans

Should Win

David: Was JJ Watt the best token defender here? Really? According to ESPN Brian Urlacher was the best defender on the planet and must have had 100 sacks before the Bears insulted him . . .by offering more than any other team in the NFL. I love Calvin- but his team stunk. so its ADP and Peyton. I’m trying to remember if ADP is better than the running back he replaced, because how did Peyton do in the playoffs vs HIS predecessor? I’m going with All Day.

EJ: Adrian Peterson. Besides the fact that he’s the face of the ESPY’s commercials the season he had was remarkable. Who wasn’t rooting for overtime so that he would have a chance at breaking Dickerson’s rushing record?

Will Win


David: If you put these four guys in a pool, and asked the expansion LA Suckups to pick who they want, a smart CEO takes Aaron, JJ, ADP, Calvin and Peyton, in that order- but based on last year? Its between Peyton and ADP. I think people forget how good Tebow was and takes Peyton here.

EJ: Adrian Peterson. All Day. Look, Peyton was a great story and Peyton would be a deserving winner but I can’t see why Adrian doesn’t win this award.

Best NBA Player


  • Carmelo Anthony – New York Knicks , Kobe Bryant – Los Angeles Lakers, Kevin Durant – Oklahoma City Thunder, LeBron James – Miami Heat, Tony Parker – San Antonio Spurs

Should Win

David: What no love for Bismack Biyambo? Kemba Walker? This is a joke right? I’d love to see who comes in second as the protest vote.

EJ: Carmelo Anthony? Who am I kidding: it’s LeBron.

Will Win

David: The guy that makes Chris Bosh look good.

EJ: Mama there goes that man! That man they call LeBron.

Best MLB Player

  • Miguel Cabrera – Detroit Tigers, R.A. Dickey – New York Mets/Toronto Blue Jays, Buster Posey – San Francisco Giants, David Price – Tampa Bay Rays, Mike Trout – Los Angles

Should WinMiguel Cabrera

David: Who’s the dude with the Beard? What about Mark McGuire? Is Roger Clements sill playing? NO?

EJ: R.A. Dickey! C’mon he won the Cy Young last year with the Mets and the Mets stunk on the days he was not pitching. OK. It’s a homer vote from me. Shout out to Brooklyn!!

Will Win

David: Cabrera, I don’t watch Baseball, but if you click on his picture voting, he makes a great case.

EJ: If you can win a Triple Crown you can win an ESPY. It’s Miguel Cabrera.

Best NHL Player


  • Sidney Crosby – Pittsburgh Penguins, Henrik Lundqvist – New York Rangers, Alexander Ovechkin – Washington Capitals, Martin St. Louis – Tampa Bay Lightning, John Tavares – New York Islanders

Should Win

David: I don’t watch Hockey, so I’m gonna punt.

EJ: Homer vote alert!! Henrik Ludqvist. Let’s go Rangers!

Will Win

David: NO ONE WATCHES HOCKEY sadly, its great live. I’m taking Ovechkin or Crosby, just because thats who Linda Cohen loves.

EJ: Linda Cohen a.k.a. Princess Pucks is actually a huge Rangers fan. I know it should be Ovechkin or Crosby but I think her and Barry Melrose rig the vote for the Swede. Get your ESPY Henrik!

Best Team


  • US Women’s Gymnastics , San Francisco Giants, Alabama Football, Baltimore Ravens, Chicago Blackhawks, Miami Heat

Should Win:

David: What? No love for the NCAA Basketball or Hockey teams? What about UNC Women’s Soccer? No lIlttle league teams or Soccer Clubs? Oh wait, ESPN doesn’t carry those sports. I wish they would have done more Olympics stuff, but who cares for another 3 years, right? As for who we have, I’m looking at who came in as the top dog, had to fight all season, and ended up winning. To me that leaves Bama and Miami. I ding NCAA teams that would not have won every year, and a non-undefeated team has be in the right year to even have a chance to win. You cash the check, you pay the price. I’ll take Miami- even though they got lucky by Parker and Manu choking more than a meth addict on a porn set in South Beach.

EJ: Roll Tide! I got to go with Bama here. Alabama football is a dynasty.

Will Win:

David: Gotta be either Bama or Miami. Baltimore has no chance, as I’m sure quite a few people don’t think they were even a top 3 team most of the year. I’m gonna take Miami again, I’m expecting a HUGE sweep for the NBA at the ESPYs.

EJ: It’s ESPN. It will be the Miami Heat. I don’t hate the Heat but ESPN rides them like a rodeo show.

 Best Female Athlete


  • Gabby Douglas – Olympic Gymnastics, Missy Franklin, Olympic Swimming , Brittney Griner – NCAA Baylor Women’s Basketball ,  Serena Williams – Women’s Tennis

Should Win:

David: Gotta come down to winning, and that does kind of hurt here, I love that half the field is a year away from being important. I’m going with Gabby, but I don’t have faith.

EJ: It should be Gabby but shout out to Brittney Griner who was the star of my The Blog About Nothing series here on 7Poundbag.

Will Win:

David: Half the field is out of the spotlight, (who the hell is Missy Franklin?)  but it comes down to Serena and Brittney, and I think its a coin flip- Older voters might take Williams by rote, younger might so Brittney just because she’s been all over ESPN during the draft.

EJ: Gabby will win it but I’d have no problem if Serena and her ample assets struts it’s fine self on that stage.


Best Male AthleteLeBron Fatality


  • Miguel Cabrera – Detroit Tigers , LeBron James – Miami Heat, Adrian Peterson – Minnesota Vikings, Michael Phelps – Olympic Swimmer

Should Win:

David: Cabrera is out, obviously, not that many old people know how to use a PC, so this is interesting. Phelps is 3rd, he’s been away a long time, and lets face it, its SWIMMING. ADP set records but didn’t win the title, but I think he comes closer than he should- the only way he wins if he’s the anti-Bron vote target, but I think that ends up being Phelps. LeBron should win.

EJ: Adrian Peterson should win but we all know he won’t.

Will Win:

David: LeBron, Slurp

EJ: Once again it’s ESPN. Once again it will be LeBron. America may love him again but America  might be tired of seeing win another award on ESPY night.

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1 Comment

  1. Missed out on hockey but I did get to see Serena’s ample assets strut itself out there on the stage.

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